It’s not easy to put a “testimony” to writing. But it’s a
story that I believe is meant to be shared, because it is the story of what God
has done in my life. The biggest challenge is providing sufficient details
without making it too long to read! I had to divide it into two parts.
At about 10 a.m. on July 1, 2012, I became a born again
Christian. Here is a brief summary of what led to that event.
I was raised a Mormon (member of the Church of Jesus Christ
of Latter-day Saints), and took my religion very seriously. It was at some
point in my youth that I first heard of those “evangelicals” or “born again
Christians” who believed so differently from us. For example, they believed
that they were “saved by grace”; we believed that was just an excuse to live
immorally, and we affirmed that “works” were necessary to earn a place with God
in the next life.
In 2007, I attended an evangelical-type church service for
the first time – with my then-girlfriend, now-wife. The deal was that she would
come to my LDS church one week, and I would go to her church the next week. I
had hoped she would convert to Mormonism. But it was around this time that my
crisis of faith began…
I never had any reason to question my faith; I believed in
it strongly. But three instances in 2007 led me to doubt for the first time:
1) My family happened upon a radio interview in the car one
day in which a man claimed to have left the church due to concerns he had with
the LDS temple endowment (I will NOT describe it here, but it is a sacred
ceremony in Mormonism). I had no idea what he was talking about, not having
been through the temple myself. But it made me wonder.
2) An interaction with a born again Christian man at my
then-girlfriend’s church. Most of the people at this church were very welcoming
and friendly even if they knew I was a Mormon; one man, however, when he found
out I was a Mormon, accused Joseph Smith (founder of Mormonism) of being a
false prophet and a freemason. He said “You can’t be a Mormon and a Christian.”
I should stress that his approach was the exception and not the rule in my
early interactions with evangelicals. But it left a lasting impression upon me
– it was upsetting, and I had nothing but contempt for the man at the time. His
mention of freemasonry puzzled me, so I looked it up online to see what on
earth he was talking about. There is a lot of sensationalism and misinformation
about freemasonry, but from what I could tell from the more reliable accounts,
it did not seem consistent with my faith. I wondered if Joseph Smith had been
involved with that kind of thing… I hoped not.
3) In November I picked up a copy of the October 2007 issue
of the Ensign, an LDS magazine. The theme of the issue was the temple. I read
an article by Boyd K. Packer called “Come to the Temple” which included a quote
from Brigham Young in it in which he described the purpose of the endowment as
receiving “key words, signs, and tokens” which would enable a person to get
back to God’s presence after they died (article can be read here: http://www.lds.org/ensign/2007/10/come-to-the-temple?lang=eng).
I had never heard this before, and I suddenly realized how little I knew about
my own religion.
I struggled for a long time, but I eventually decided to see
what those “anti-Mormon” evangelicals had to say about Mormonism. I didn’t like
what I read. It was here that I found a solid link between freemasonry and
Mormonism, and none of it seemed to have anything to do with Jesus. My faith
was shaken.
In January 2008, I moved away from home to start university.
I continued to attend the LDS church for a short time, but inside I was
struggling with my faith. I soon encountered a book called “The God Delusion”
by Richard Dawkins, an atheist who argued that God likely did not exist, and
that the Bible was written by primitive men. It made sense to me, and provided
much-needed certainty in a time of turmoil and change. I soon became an
atheist. In summer 2008, I asked to have my name removed from the LDS church.
Life went on. I continued at university and I became a
husband and father. Life was good; I had no need for God or religion.
I was content, but God wasn't; he reached into my life in ways that I couldn't have imagined. In my next blog post I will recount my conversion to Christianity. Thank you for reading!
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